Everyone wants to be liked, but no one is liked by everyone. It is an universal truth that all who live on this planet must accept. However, many have realized that they can not please everyone if they want to achieve something of value in this world. Sometimes you just have to go your own way and avoid listening to all the skeptics around you.
Despite this, as a Gentleman it is important to know about the traits that makes us more or less likeable. As argued in a previous article, many millennials nowadays are too busy with themselves and therefore it can be difficult for them to consider other people and their needs. In the process it could be difficult to pay attention to the signs that other people express regarding your behavior.
In the book Why we don’t like people by Donald A. Laird från year 1933 we learn about the traits that either makes us popular or unpopular among other people. In the book the author refers to a survey conducted by the Colgate Psychological Laboratory in 1929 about human characteristics and habits.
According to the survey there are 45 characteristics that determine people’s emotional attitude towards a person. Based on these characteristics, the author himself made an own survey were we can test how likeable we are among other people.
The higher your score by this self-analysis the better liked you are in general. The highest possible score is 81. According to the author, about 10% of people have this score. The lowest score made by a person who was generally liked was 56. The average young person has a score of 64. The average score of a person who is generally disliked is 30. The lowest score we found was 12.
Here is the survey:
Traits Which Make Us Liked
Give yourself a score of 3 for each of these questions you can answer “Yes”:
1 . Can you always be depended upon to do what you say
you will?
2. Do you go out of your way cheerfully to help others?
3. Do you avoid exaggeration in all your statements?
4. Do you avoid being sarcastic?
5. Do you refrain from showing off how much you know?
6. Do you feel inferior to most of your associates?
7. Do you refrain from bossing people not employed by
you?
8. Do you keep from reprimanding people who do things
that displease you?
9. Do you avoid making fun of others behind their backs?
10. Do you keep from domineering others?
Give yourself a score of 2 for each of these questions
you can answer “Yes”:
11. Do you keep your clothing neat and tidy?
12. Do you avoid being bold and nervy?
13. Do you avoid laughing at the mistakes of others?
14. Is your attitude toward the opposite sex free from
vulgarity?
15. Do you avoid finding fault with everyday things?
16. Do you let the mistakes of others pass without cor-
recting them?
17. Do you loan things to others readily?
18. Are you careful not to tell jokes that will embarrass
those listening?
19. Do you let others have their own way?
20. Do you always control your temper?
21. Do you keep out of arguments?
22. Do you smile pleasantly?
23. Do you avoid talking almost continuously?
24. Do you keep you nose entirely out of other people’s
business?
Give yourself a score of 1 for each of these questions
you can answer “Yes”:
25. Do you have patience with modern ideas?
26. Do you avoid flattering others?
27. Do you avoid gossiping?
28. Do you refrain from asking people to repeat what
they have just said?
29. Do you avoid asking questions in keeping up a conver-
sation?
30. Do you avoid asking favors of others?
31. Do you avoid trying to reform others?
32. Do you keep your personal troubles to yourself?
33. Are you natural rather than dignified?
34. Are you usually cheerful?
35. Are you conservative in politics?
36. Are you enthusiastic rather than lethargic?
37. Do you pronounce words correctly?
38. Do you look upon others without suspicion?
39. Do you avoid being lazy?
40. Do you avoid borrowing things?
41. Do you refrain from telling people their moral duty?
42. Do you avoid trying to convert people to your beliefs?
43. Do you avoid talking rapidly?
44. Do you avoid laughing loudly?
45. Do you avoid making fun of people to their faces?
